Question:
My fiance and I will be inheriting enough crystal and china so we don’t plan on asking for that on our various registries. However, neither of us have the more common niceties that most households do (TV, VCR, Microwave) and we would love to register for these kinds of items. Needless to say: these are a bit pricey! We are hoping that when friends of ours look at the registry and see a Toshiba 27" Color TV for 400 bucks, they will assume that we hope 5-8 of them will pool resources to purchase it. We don’t want/expect people to shell out hundreds for our gift. But in looking at a recent posting to this newsgroup, I saw that someone was aghast at finding a $1000 CamCorder on the registry. We don’t want to shock any of our friends like this. I guess I see two options: just ask for 8 (or so) gift certificates at $50 each (which I think telegraphs a bit too much on what we think one person SHOULD spend on us) for an electronics store. OR just trust word of mouth (i.e.: have Mom spread the word that certain people should get together to buy certain pricey gifts). Am I missing any options? One thing I don’t plan asking for is money (I’ve heard that ASKING for $$$ is major faux-pas city! Giving cash is perfecty acceptable tho, and I have done this more than once) In no rush… Wedding is Oct 29. —Brendan J. Murray in Alexandria Va
Response:
Okay I just realized it was closer to a $1000 dollar gift, and not $2000. I think this makes a difference — I still think it’s a bit much but not with the same vehemence as before. — "Some people are unable to experience even the slightest of life’s pleasures without being thrown into frenzies of analysis." – P.J. O’Rourke
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->cks) writes: >>Overall, the items were varied in cost and would suit just about any budget. >>However, I was a bit amused when I saw that the last item on the 8-page >>list was a camcorder, priced at approximately $1,190. Does that strike >>anyone else as strange? >I think this is pretty rude, personally. I realize that many people will >disagree very violently (don’t hurt me!) but I would not do this, even if >everyone coming to my wedding was a billionaire. I spent $50 for the last >wedding present I bought. I think this is usually pretty appropriate. >Haven’t you ever heard of people going in on a gift together? This >is actually becoming more a tradition with our friends. Since many >of the couples are older now and have been out on their own for some >time and have just about everything they need already, it’s not uncommon >for our friends to get together and get the bride and groom a larger >gift…something they said they wanted and could really use, like a >small freezer or something. >I for one already have two sets of dishes, two sets of pans, two sets >of silverware and all the furniture I could possibly want and between >the two us enough Christmas ornaments to cover three Christmas trees.
I think the major difference in style here is that I am still in grad school and have trouble finding money to buy a guest book, so I guess a $2000 gift seems a bit odd to me. Still, even going in on a gift like that would mean spending a lot of money per person, unless the entire guest list contributed. I’m not saying it’s wrong, just that I wouldn’t want someone to see that on my registry list. Again, I’m sure it’s mostly different circumstances! — "Some people are unable to experience even the slightest of life’s pleasures without being thrown into frenzies of analysis." – P.J. O’Rourke
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>cks) writes: >Overall, the items were varied in cost and would suit just about any budget. >However, I was a bit amused when I saw that the last item on the 8-page >list was a camcorder, priced at approximately $1,190. Does that strike >anyone else as strange? >I think this is pretty rude, personally. I realize that many people will >disagree very violently (don’t hurt me!) but I would not do this, even if >everyone coming to my wedding was a billionaire. I spent $50 for the last >wedding present I bought. I think this is usually pretty appropriate.
Haven’t you ever heard of people going in on a gift together? This is actually becoming more a tradition with our friends. Since many of the couples are older now and have been out on their own for some time and have just about everything they need already, it’s not uncommon for our friends to get together and get the bride and groom a larger gift…something they said they wanted and could really use, like a small freezer or something. I for one already have two sets of dishes, two sets of pans, two sets of silverware and all the furniture I could possibly want and between the two us enough Christmas ornaments to cover three Christmas trees. Teresa ——-
Response:
>Overall, the items were varied in cost and would suit just about any budget. >However, I was a bit amused when I saw that the last item on the 8-page >list was a camcorder, priced at approximately $1,190. Does that strike >anyone else as strange?
Not particularly. You never know who has wealthy friends and relatives lurking out there somewhere. You never know who might have a large group of friends who’d like to go in together on something substantial. I know several people who registered at Tiffany’s for some outrageous things because one side of the family or other expected it (some of them even got stuff from there! 
Maybe they had a hint from a friend or relative that he or she would like to get them a camcorder and this was their way of pointing out one that would fit with the rest of their equipment? It wouldn’t surprise me or strike me as odd at all to see something like this on a registry, though I’d probably have to pass on it myself. Ericka
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(Tamara D. Hicks) writes:
|> |> |> Overall, the items were varied in cost and would suit just about any budget. |> However, I was a bit amused when I saw that the last item on the 8-page |> list was a camcorder, priced at approximately $1,190. Does that strike |> anyone else as strange? |> I wouldn’t think twice about it. We have one ridiculously priced item on our registry as well. My fiance’s stepmother made it clear that she wanted us to register for that particular item. I think she just wanted us to pick one out that was the style we liked, without asking us directly what we wanted. Now we’ll just have to see if we get it! Remember that the registry is a wish list, not a demand list. I certainly wouldn’t expect any of my friends to buy something that expensive. K
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>I recently went to Hudson’s to pick up registry information for a family friend >who is getting married. It was interesting to see what they registered for and >it gave me ideas on what I’d want to pick for our registry. It also gave me >ideas on what I *wouldn’t* put on our list. >Overall, the items were varied in cost and would suit just about any budget. >However, I was a bit amused when I saw that the last item on the 8-page >list was a camcorder, priced at approximately $1,190. Does that strike >anyone else as strange?
Only if none of their guests could possibly afford it. I mean, you wouldn’t spend that much on a gift, but maybe a friend of their parents might. We got some very generous gifts from our parents’ friends, although most of the high side was in cash. (Cash is fine. We like cash. In those cases when we wrote the thank you we told them what we used their gift for.) Maddi & Cliff 10-10-93 The wedding? That was last year. — Centigram Communications Corp San Jose California 408/428-3553 "A catchy slogan should appear here" –Dave Barry
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I recently went to Hudson’s to pick up registry information for a family friend who is getting married. It was interesting to see what they registered for and it gave me ideas on what I’d want to pick for our registry. It also gave me ideas on what I *wouldn’t* put on our list. Overall, the items were varied in cost and would suit just about any budget. However, I was a bit amused when I saw that the last item on the 8-page list was a camcorder, priced at approximately $1,190. Does that strike anyone else as strange? Tamara (& John) September 3, 1994
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[clip] >Overall, the items were varied in cost and would suit just about any budget. >However, I was a bit amused when I saw that the last item on the 8-page >list was a camcorder, priced at approximately $1,190. Does that strike >anyone else as strange?
I think this is pretty rude, personally. I realize that many people will disagree very violently (don’t hurt me!) but I would not do this, even if everyone coming to my wedding was a billionaire. I spent $50 for the last wedding present I bought. I think this is usually pretty appropriate. If it is a special case — a relative, or something, so you spend a few hundred bucks. I guess it’s a case of different standards. I don’t mean to harsh on your friends! But even though I know there are some well-to- do folks coming to our wedding, I was *very* conservative in what I would register for. Just my personal viewpoint here. The wedding catalogues will tell you that you can register for whatevr you want — camping gear, clothing, cars, whatever … but I don’t think everyone feels the same way. — "Some people are unable to experience even the slightest of life’s pleasures without being thrown into frenzies of analysis." – P.J. O’Rourke
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Well, I was really sick this weekend, but we went anyway. We spent two > hours on it and still have to go back. Bloomingdales lost their appointment > book so they didn’t have anyone to walk around with us. It took us a while > to get the hang of the code gun and we couldn’t find a lot of things we > wanted. > Our next trip to Bloomingdales will be to add some things and remove some > things. Since a lot of stuff isn’t well marked, we found we have a lot of > expensive ($200+) stuff and not as much less expensive stuff. > What we’re planning is to go to Pier 1 (please, no comments about quality > unless you can come up with another store that’s in both Canada and the US > that isn’t Sears or KMart) once they have their ‘winter’ stuff. Once we’re > done there, we’ll go back to Bloomingdales and fill in the registery with > stuf we couldn’t find at Pier 1. In the meantime, I’ll call Bloomingdale’s > to fix a few of the mixtakes they made. > Is it supposed to be this difficult?
My fiance and I registered yesterday at Target (don’t know if they’re in Canada) and Pier 1. They were both EXTREMELY easy. Plus, they’re registries are online, so I can email changes to the list. I can also check what my guests are doing online, or they can purchase online. This was important to me because I live and die by my computer. No appointments needed. Target gives you a very nice wedding planner. Pier 1 gives you a nice book about their products. I didn’t find a huge selection at Pier 1, but we love their stuff. I thought they had sheets and bedding and towels, but they don’t. So, we’ll be adding that to our Target list. Good luck! — Good tidings, Nancy Martin 12/17/00 The Simpsons – http://simpsons.about.com The Buffy Store – http://come.to/thebuffystore Buffy Greetings – http://welcome.to/buffygreetings
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Sorry you had trouble at Bloomies. At first we were really sure we wanted to register there, but after going in there (the one in Century City), we decided against it. I got a really bad vibe (it’s just me, I’m sure) and didn’t feel comfortable. I also felt for the guests we are having, the prices were on the high side. We ended up at Macys (the one in the Beverly Center) and had a great coordinator to help us. We didn’t have any trouble there (although I KNOW a lot of people have had problems with Macys in the past and they have been slammed on this NG many times). Registering is a chore, but when you get it done, you will have a serious sense of accomplishment! It’s also a good way to see how you’ll deal with tasks in your marriage! I remember when we registered at Crate & Barrel, there were a lot of other couples registering and FIGHTING, I couldn’t believe it. Melissa Got questions? Get answers over the phone at Keen.com. Up to 100 minutes free! http://www.keen.com
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Well, I was really sick this weekend, but we went anyway. We spent two hours on it and still have to go back. Bloomingdales lost their appointment book so they didn’t have anyone to walk around with us. It took us a while to get the hang of the code gun and we couldn’t find a lot of things we wanted. Our next trip to Bloomingdales will be to add some things and remove some things. Since a lot of stuff isn’t well marked, we found we have a lot of expensive ($200+) stuff and not as much less expensive stuff. What we’re planning is to go to Pier 1 (please, no comments about quality unless you can come up with another store that’s in both Canada and the US that isn’t Sears or KMart) once they have their ‘winter’ stuff. Once we’re done there, we’ll go back to Bloomingdales and fill in the registery with stuf we couldn’t find at Pier 1. In the meantime, I’ll call Bloomingdale’s to fix a few of the mixtakes they made. Is it supposed to be this difficult? Melissa
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Here are a few tips: 1. Make a list of everything you want to register for BEFORE you go in to register. This cuts down on the time it takes. Your consultant will suggest many things, if you have a list, you can say no to anything not on the list. 2. Don’t register for picture frames, crystal bowls, or vases unless there are one or two you can’t live without. You will get so many of these things anyway, so there really isn’t any poin tin registering for them. We got 6 crystal bowls. All of them were very beautiful and all different sizes, so we kept them all. We registered for only one. 3. People will buy from all price ranges, so make sure you have things from all price ranges. We had people go together to buy us more expensive items, so don’t be shy about registering for those things as well as the inexpensive ones. 4. Make sure you don’t register for linens more than a couple months before because they all change with the seasons. You will have to go back and change your selections if you register too early. Good Luck. Kelli – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > We have an appointment to register this coming Saturday at Bloomingdales. > We’re also going to register at Pier 1 Imports, but we’re only doing that > for the Canadian relatives (it’s the only store that’s in both countries > where we like the merchandise). (Whew, what an introduction.) > My question is, is there any advice you can give me for registering? Was > there anything you regret registering for or that you wish you had put on > your registery? Have any price ranges gone particularly quickly so you had > to re-register for more stuff at that price level?
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Not too mention poorly trained sales people who will treat you rudely. -L.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I am registered at macy’s > Howm horrible for you! They are full of liars and thieves and crooks! > Ron Ng Knows!
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We registered on-line at http://www.ewish.com. We registered for fun stuff like professional kites, a telescope, eco-related stuff and camping gear. Basically, you just list what you would like, and provide a link to a webpage. It is REALLY easy, and a good way for your friends who are a bit unconventional to discover your tastes, and maybe even the "perfect" gift. HTH, L. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> We were thinking about registering but honestly, after having > looked around a couple of department stores that were full of > young couples earnestly discussing the merits of Wedgewood vs > Royal Doulton, we just couldn’t stomach the whole process. I > also don’t see why I should give the store so much custom for > free. > So we have ended up just making a long list of ideas — which > doesn’t include flatware, saucepans, or linen — with the notion > that if people want to see the list, they can do that, and then > go and pick something from some convenient place. I imagine that > if you know you have wealthy family and friends (which doesn’t > apply to me ) then specifying expensive china/ cutlery is > fine; but I would have felt as though I was mocking my friends > by doing that. We’ll be happy to see them; I’m sure we’ll be > happy with whatever (if anything) they want to bring. > Well, a zillion years ago before computers and UPC light guns, > young couples would often simply leave a list of the kind of stuff > they wanted with their moms and maybe a couple other "social" women > in the family, and people could find out that way. You might want > to just give the lists to a couple other people many of the guests > will be asking — usually moms and main honor attendants. > Something else to consider: Registering is no longer only about > china and silver. You might want to consider letting people know > about, for example, your landscape preference for the house you’re > buying, or the home improvement store, or the camping gear you’re > upgrading to. Again, you can leave this list with your moms, but > you might feel "better" about simply registering at a store that > has the stuff you want at a good price. > Other information that usually gets included other than just silver > and china type: Colors and furniture style for bedroom, living > room, kitchen and bath — so people can pick up various > housewares/household stuff that will match, or even *make* > something cool you hadn’t thought of.
Response:
>We were thinking about registering but honestly, after having >looked around a couple of department stores that were full of >young couples earnestly discussing the merits of Wedgewood vs >Royal Doulton, we just couldn’t stomach the whole process.
What’s wrong with discussing the merits of WEDGWOOD vs. Royal Doulton? I could discuss china patterns all day long! It is a major hooby of mine and I adore collecting china. I have almost a dozen sets now and I never tire of it. Just because you don’t have friends who would buy you china doesn’t mean that other people don’t and can’t register for it. Sounds like sour grapes to me! Ron Ng Knows!
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>I am registered at macy’s
Howm horrible for you! They are full of liars and thieves and crooks! Ron Ng Knows!
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>I could discuss china patterns all day long! It is a major hooby of mine >and I adore collecting china. I have almost a dozen sets now and I never >tire of it.
Please share! I don’t have a dozen sets, but I do covet many patterns, both antique and modern. What do you have? Do you combine patterns for more interesting tablesettings? — JM
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> >I could discuss china patterns all day long! It is a major hooby of mine >and I adore collecting china. I have almost a dozen sets now and I never >tire of it.
More and more, I’m starting to think that "Ron ng" is a pseudonym for Christopher Lowell. And what’s a hooby? Or maybe I shouldn’t ask…
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>We registered >at Michael C. Fina
I hope that everything comes to you in pristine condition because if anything shows up damaged, you have to live with it. Michael C. Fina doesn’t accept returns of their own merchandise which is sent out damaged in the first place! I’ve got a horribly scratched $350 crystal bowl from them that they refused to do anything about. It was NOT damaged in shipping. It was that way when THEY boxed it up. Their response was that we had to bring it in to their NYC store IN PERSON within a month. Since we do not live in or near NYC, that was impossible. Their reponse: "You’ll just have to live with it. There’s nothing we can do." Michael C. Fina is full of lying THIEVES and CROOKS. Ron Ng Knows!
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>was convenient to all the guests. Mom was right as usual – almost every >item on the Macy’s registry was purchased.
Wow… we only got about 10%- but everything off of our other registry, plus $300 in gift certificates. Word about Macy’s got around the guests quickly! I just wish so many people hadn’t been spurned in the learning process. >I was pleasantly surprised when I went to Macy’s on Sunday to get my 10% >registry completion bonus. The only items remaining on the registry were
I’m pleasantly surprised that you found a store worker who would acknowledge you! We could hardly get someone to give us the scan-gun after our first visit, when they were very nice. Though during my six months of calling around trying to get the last of our wedding gifts delivered, I did get to know some of the employees by voice. -xine
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I registered at Macy’s reluctantly due to the many horror stories I had seen on this group, but my mother insisted that it was the only store that was convenient to all the guests. Mom was right as usual – almost every item on the Macy’s registry was purchased. I was pleasantly surprised when I went to Macy’s on Sunday to get my 10% registry completion bonus. The only items remaining on the registry were table linens and sheets. We had picked this one set of table linens because they matched our dishes perfectly. Well, of course, I didn’t listen to the many warnings about discontinued items and the linens were discontinued. I spoke with the manager and he was very sorry but there was no way he could get them for us. We were so disappointed and kicking ourselves for not buying them when we had the chance. The manager told us to pick out any table linens and sheets (ours were also discontinued) that we liked and he would give us the 10% off. They were having a huge sale so we were able to get some things we liked at a very good price. Lizliz11 – don’t worry too much about the higher prices. I agree that the consultant who told you the sale prices would remain in affect for the duration registry was an idiot. But your guests who are price conscious will know that Macy’s regularly has good sales and will check the ads for the items on your registry. We registered approximately 5 months before our wedding and most of the items went on sale at least twice in that period. I don’t think I have ever paid full price for a wedding gift at Macy’s. Julie : >HUGE TIP!!! : > : >I am registered at macy’s and one thing that really disturbs me is that I : >registered for several items specifically because they were on sale and my : > [. . .] : : A more precise "HUGE TIP"- don’t register at Macy’s! I’ve heard some people : on the West Coast think they do an okay job, but in general, they are a : nightmare to "work" with. : : I have horror stories if anyone really wants to hear details about my : dealings with registry problems with Macy’s. : : -xine
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>HUGE TIP!!! >I am registered at macy’s and one thing that really disturbs me is that I >registered for several items specifically because they were on sale and my > [. . .]
A more precise "HUGE TIP"- don’t register at Macy’s! I’ve heard some people on the West Coast think they do an okay job, but in general, they are a nightmare to "work" with. I have horror stories if anyone really wants to hear details about my dealings with registry problems with Macy’s. -xine
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>We’re also going to register at Pier 1 Imports,
How VULGAR! It’s a great place if you like junk made by child labor that’ll fall apart in a season. Ron Ng Knows!
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> HUGE TIP!!! > I am registered at macy’s and one thing that really disturbs me is that I > registered for several items specifically because they were on sale and my > guests could afford them. I was told by the consultant that they would pay > that price. Well, come to find out, they don’t! And now I’m embarrassed that > I have 120 dollar items on my registry that were only 40 dollars when I scanned > them! My advice, don’t register for anything that is on sale if you don’t want > guests paying full price for it.
Most of your budget conscious guests will check with Mom on where you’re registered, maybe even scope out what you’re looking for, and then wait for a sale. Some of your guests might even go buy your national-brand china or silver at a discount store and then get it to you quickly so you can call your registry store and have it removed.
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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > We were thinking about registering but honestly, after having > looked around a couple of department stores that were full of > young couples earnestly discussing the merits of Wedgewood vs > Royal Doulton, we just couldn’t stomach the whole process. I > also don’t see why I should give the store so much custom for > free. > So we have ended up just making a long list of ideas — which > doesn’t include flatware, saucepans, or linen — with the notion > that if people want to see the list, they can do that, and then > go and pick something from some convenient place. I imagine that > if you know you have wealthy family and friends (which doesn’t > apply to me ) then specifying expensive china/ cutlery is > fine; but I would have felt as though I was mocking my friends > by doing that. We’ll be happy to see them; I’m sure we’ll be > happy with whatever (if anything) they want to bring.
Well, a zillion years ago before computers and UPC light guns, young couples would often simply leave a list of the kind of stuff they wanted with their moms and maybe a couple other "social" women in the family, and people could find out that way. You might want to just give the lists to a couple other people many of the guests will be asking — usually moms and main honor attendants. Something else to consider: Registering is no longer only about china and silver. You might want to consider letting people know about, for example, your landscape preference for the house you’re buying, or the home improvement store, or the camping gear you’re upgrading to. Again, you can leave this list with your moms, but you might feel "better" about simply registering at a store that has the stuff you want at a good price. Other information that usually gets included other than just silver and china type: Colors and furniture style for bedroom, living room, kitchen and bath — so people can pick up various housewares/household stuff that will match, or even *make* something cool you hadn’t thought of.
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HUGE TIP!!! I am registered at macy’s and one thing that really disturbs me is that I registered for several items specifically because they were on sale and my guests could afford them. I was told by the consultant that they would pay that price. Well, come to find out, they don’t! And now I’m embarrassed that I have 120 dollar items on my registry that were only 40 dollars when I scanned them! My advice, don’t register for anything that is on sale if you don’t want guests paying full price for it. 
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We were thinking about registering but honestly, after having looked around a couple of department stores that were full of young couples earnestly discussing the merits of Wedgewood vs Royal Doulton, we just couldn’t stomach the whole process. I also don’t see why I should give the store so much custom for free. So we have ended up just making a long list of ideas — which doesn’t include flatware, saucepans, or linen — with the notion that if people want to see the list, they can do that, and then go and pick something from some convenient place. I imagine that if you know you have wealthy family and friends (which doesn’t apply to me ) then specifying expensive china/ cutlery is fine; but I would have felt as though I was mocking my friends by doing that. We’ll be happy to see them; I’m sure we’ll be happy with whatever (if anything) they want to bring. j. (FWIW, I love Wedgewood, but I think we’ll try to get a good deal on seconds in the January Sales if we really feel the need to own posh china. That’s also annual bonus time!) Got questions? Get answers over the phone at Keen.com. Up to 100 minutes free! http://www.keen.com
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Actually, I registered for everything from fancy kitchen gadgets (<$10) to expensive tableware (>$100/pl.set.). We received most of the more expensive items, and actually very little of the less expensive stuff. I really wanted some of the table linens, kitchen ware, picture frames, etc, but no one bought them. I was really surprised. -L.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> We have an appointment to register this coming Saturday at Bloomingdales. > We’re also going to register at Pier 1 Imports, but we’re only doing that > for the Canadian relatives (it’s the only store that’s in both countries > where we like the merchandise). (Whew, what an introduction.) > My question is, is there any advice you can give me for registering? Was > there anything you regret registering for or that you wish you had put on > your registery? Have any price ranges gone particularly quickly so you had > to re-register for more stuff at that price level? > Thanks in advance. I don’t know why I’m nervous about this when the rest of > the planning hasn’t made me the least bit nervous. > Melissa (March 18 next year)
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>We have an appointment to register this coming Saturday at Bloomingdales.
Hey! How timely! We just did this over the past several days. We registered at Michael C. Fina (steeply discounted china, crystal and silver) and Crate and Barrel. I felt tremendously greedy about it, but then I decided it’s just a ‘wish list’ and if folks want to give us stuff they will and if they don’t they won’t! I was *most* pleased by the fact that DF and I agreed on everything, so no traumas there. We registered for Royal Worcester (Howard Cobalt Platinum), Waterford (Castlemaine) and their house brand of silver. At CnB, we registered for glassware, and entertaining stuff. Anyone else?? Liz (it’s starting to feel real!) to Jim, November 11, 2000
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I know it’s too early, but my mother is totally on my case because most of the friends/family aren’t in LA (they’re in various cities in the eastern part of Canada) and want to get us engagement gifts. I’m not sure if I’m having a shower back home or not. I know I’ll have to register at Pier 1 twice (or more depending on how frequently they change seasong), but I figured it was a little deal to do so and make my mother happy. Melissa
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Funny, I was really nervous about registering for some reason > too. I don’t know why, I guess I was freaked about choosing the > wrong things. Anyway, in the end, we ended up having tons of > fun with it. > I can’t say what to get and what not to get or what price ranges > go first, but IMO, you are registering too early, especially for > Pier 1, who carries tons of seasonal items, most of which won’t > still be around next year when your guests are getting ready to > buy you gifts. > Bloomies should be safe, most of what they have is classic and > will be around for years (ie: I hear Waterford never > discontinues patterns). So perhaps you should wait on the Pier > 1 until it gets a little closer. > Are you having many showers? I am having 3 (had 2 already) and > people seemed to buy us more stuff from our Crate & Barrel > registry (less formal stuff) than from our Macys registry. > Shower gifts tend to be less expensive than wedding gifts. > Melissa > Got questions? Get answers over the phone at Keen.com. > Up to 100 minutes free! > http://www.keen.com
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> We have an appointment to register this coming Saturday at Bloomingdales. > We’re also going to register at Pier 1 Imports, but we’re only doing that > for the Canadian relatives (it’s the only store that’s in both countries > where we like the merchandise). (Whew, what an introduction.) > My question is, is there any advice you can give me for registering? Was > there anything you regret registering for or that you wish you had put on > your registery? Have any price ranges gone particularly quickly so you had > to re-register for more stuff at that price level?
Actually, the price range question is going to have a lot to do with your guests and the showers you might/might not have. Do you have lots of college/young guests on the list? People who don’t have lots of disposable income? Are your attendants already discussing shower ideas? You might want to register for a larger variety of lower price ($3-20) items just to make sure people can pick up a couple items they like, or so they get an idea of what kind of stuff would go well in your house and then go off and find/make something really cool and unique just for the two of you. On the other hand, if you have lots of more traditional/established/better off guests, or if you belong to organizations or groups that tend to get together and go in on a larger gift, you might want to emphasize "good" silver, nicer sets of glasses and dishes, or possibly some types of furniture or appliances. It really depends on your guests, though, and don’t be surprised if one of them checks your registry and sees what colors you use in, for example, your front room, andthen comes up with a lovely throw for your couch or something. Choose from a variety of price ranges so everyone can find stuff. The only other warning would be that lots of "soft" goods — some lines of towels, home goods, etc. — end up being seasonal or offered for less than a year, so you might want to go back to see what might get discontinued to change your registry in a few months if that’s the type of stuff you’re selecting.
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Funny, I was really nervous about registering for some reason too. I don’t know why, I guess I was freaked about choosing the wrong things. Anyway, in the end, we ended up having tons of fun with it. I can’t say what to get and what not to get or what price ranges go first, but IMO, you are registering too early, especially for Pier 1, who carries tons of seasonal items, most of which won’t still be around next year when your guests are getting ready to buy you gifts. Bloomies should be safe, most of what they have is classic and will be around for years (ie: I hear Waterford never discontinues patterns). So perhaps you should wait on the Pier 1 until it gets a little closer. Are you having many showers? I am having 3 (had 2 already) and people seemed to buy us more stuff from our Crate & Barrel registry (less formal stuff) than from our Macys registry. Shower gifts tend to be less expensive than wedding gifts. Melissa Got questions? Get answers over the phone at Keen.com. Up to 100 minutes free! http://www.keen.com
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We have an appointment to register this coming Saturday at Bloomingdales. We’re also going to register at Pier 1 Imports, but we’re only doing that for the Canadian relatives (it’s the only store that’s in both countries where we like the merchandise). (Whew, what an introduction.) My question is, is there any advice you can give me for registering? Was there anything you regret registering for or that you wish you had put on your registery? Have any price ranges gone particularly quickly so you had to re-register for more stuff at that price level? Thanks in advance. I don’t know why I’m nervous about this when the rest of the planning hasn’t made me the least bit nervous. Melissa (March 18 next year)
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> Mike and I registered a couple of weeks ago. We aren’t done, but what > else is new?! Anyway, we have yet to register for pots and pans… any > suggestions out there as to wether aluminum or copper is better > sandwiched between stainless steel? I just read a comment about copper > that I didn’t like, that the person burned it… Iwas hoping the copper > wouldn’t burn!
Depends on what sort of stove you’re planning to use. The old Revere Ware set, with the bare copper bottoms was just fine on a regular stovetop, but when my parents bought a glasstop range (smoothtop) we found that the copper bottoms had distorted over time and caused them to hop all over the stovetop. We replaced them with the newer version of Revere that has the copper sandwiched in aluminum (the pots themselves are still made out of stainless steel) and they heat up just as fast. The secret to the copper bottom pots is that you don’t try to cook everything on high heat, the copper discolors to the point where all the copper cleaner in the world can’t get them clean. Sarah & Scott (September 6, 1998)
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>> > I honestly think that aluminum is > > better … > (more lines deleted) > What ever happened to the supposed linkage between > aluminum and Alzheimer’s disease? Is it still > regarded as a health concern? >I think it came out that it wasn’t a cause…maybe just a correlation.
Not even a correlation. I don’t have the figures or any sources, but I know there’s a big write-up on this in the rec.food.cooking FAQ if anyone wants to follow it further. To clarify — our pots and frying pan are stainless steel with an aluminum "sandwich" on the bottom — WAY better than aluminum pots IMO. — Carrie If you want me to read email, do NOT reply to the above address Send mail to carrie AT kestrel (dot) umd (dot) edu http://www.geocities.com/TheTropics/8331
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I read somewhere that copper reacts with acidic foods like tomatoes and for that reason is sandwiched with another (less reactive) metal. I have some copper-bottomed stainless steel pots and pans that I like (Revere or Farber Ware, I can’t remember which). Food doesn’t seem to burn or stick too badly to them. any – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> suggestions out there as to wether aluminum or copper is better sandwiched > between stainless steel? I just read a comment about copper that I didn’t > like, that the person burned it… Iwas hoping the copper wouldn’t burn! > gack!
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I honestly think that aluminum is > better … > (more lines deleted) > What ever happened to the supposed linkage between > aluminum and Alzheimer’s disease? Is it still > regarded as a health concern? > Personally I suppose I have more access to aluminum > through beer and soda cans than through cooking, but > this might be something to consider if you’re getting > quality cookware to last for decades. > Cheers > JSBayne
I think it came out that it wasn’t a cause…maybe just a correlation. Amy — Light travels faster than sound, which is why some people appear bright until they speak.
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The current scientific wisdom is that ingestion of aluminum does _not_ seem to cause Alzheimer’s, although aluminum is present in the brain’s "plaques and tangles", indicative of Alzheimer’s. OBWedding: We registered for Calphalon, which is anodized aluminum and thus won’t react with food. We love the sample pan that we bought. But, it doesn’t work well for cooking without any fat or liquid (we use non-stick for that). Audrey (&Michael) the neuroscientists – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > What ever happened to the supposed linkage between > aluminum and Alzheimer’s disease? Is it still > regarded as a health concern?
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In article > The current scientific wisdom is that ingestion of aluminum does _not_ > seem to cause Alzheimer’s, although aluminum is present in the brain’s > "plaques and tangles", indicative of Alzheimer’s. > OBWedding: We registered for Calphalon, which is anodized aluminum and > thus won’t react with food. We love the sample pan that we bought. But, > it doesn’t work well for cooking without any fat or liquid (we use > non-stick for that). > Audrey (&Michael) the neuroscientists
You know, there is a non-stick Calphalon out now. "Professional" non-stick line maybe? Personally, I gave mine away. I didn’t like how everything stuck to it and it’s a pain to clean. We did get a non-stick grill pan for a wedding gift, and it’s MUCH easier, although still tougher to clean than the heavy stainless/aluminum cookware we have. I also cringe to think that the cost to make an 8" omelette pan is about $2 and they charge $35 for it retail. Amy — Light travels faster than sound, which is why some people appear bright until they speak.
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>> Mike and I registered a couple of weeks ago. We aren’t done, but what > else is new?! Anyway, we have yet to register for pots and pans… any > suggestions out there as to wether aluminum or copper is better > sandwiched between stainless steel? I just read a comment about copper > that I didn’t like, that the person burned it… Iwas hoping the copper > wouldn’t burn!
No, I did NOT write that! >Depends on what sort of stove you’re planning to use. The old Revere >Ware set, with the bare copper bottoms was just fine on a regular >stovetop, but when my parents bought a glasstop range (smoothtop) we >found that the copper bottoms had distorted over time and caused them to >hop all over the stovetop. We replaced them with the newer version of >Revere that has the copper sandwiched in aluminum (the pots themselves >are still made out of stainless steel) and they heat up just as fast. >The secret to the copper bottom pots is that you don’t try to cook >everything on high heat, the copper discolors to the point where all the >copper cleaner in the world can’t get them clean. >Sarah & Scott (September 6, 1998)
Today’s (8/21/97) Bible Fak*toid: (An "A God is Love" special!!!) "In order that Joshua might have good light to thoroughly butcher the Amorites, God makes the sun stand still for an entire day." Joshua 10:12-14 Stolen from Ken’s Guide To The Bible by Ken Smith, available via order from Barnes and Noble or other good bookstores. It is worth every penny of the $7.95 price!
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>> Mike and I registered a couple of weeks ago. We aren’t done, but what > else is new?! Anyway, we have yet to register for pots and pans… any > suggestions out there as to wether aluminum or copper is better sandwiched > between stainless steel? I just read a comment about copper that I didn’t > like, that the person burned it… Iwas hoping the copper wouldn’t burn! > gack! >Both copper and aluminum bottoms wil burn (food)…you have to get used to >how cookware heats, such as: if and where it has hotspots (although I’ve >been told aluminum heats more evenly)…any cookware can burn (food that >is…the copper will discolor and will have to be scoured with a mild >cleanser to keep that shiny finish).
In my unscientific survey of copper vs. alumninum. We burned the hell out of our [Reverware] copper plated frying pan, but have had /great/ success with our [Macy's Tools of the Trade] aluminum sandwich stainless steele saute pan (and sauce pans as well). I honestly think that aluminum is better UNLESS you can spend the major buck and get the super nice all copper pans with stainless steele liners (the $250 each ones). But that’s my opinion. — Carrie If you want me to read email, do NOT reply to the above address Send mail to carrie AT kestrel (dot) umd (dot) edu http://www.geocities.com/TheTropics/8331
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> Mike and I registered a couple of weeks ago. We aren’t done, but what > else is new?! Anyway, we have yet to register for pots and pans… any > suggestions out there as to wether aluminum or copper is better sandwiched > between stainless steel? I just read a comment about copper that I didn’t > like, that the person burned it… Iwas hoping the copper wouldn’t burn! > gack! > as well… we are going to register for some camping equipment as we enjoy > doing that > KA
Both copper and aluminum bottoms wil burn (food)…you have to get used to how cookware heats, such as: if and where it has hotspots (although I’ve been told aluminum heats more evenly)…any cookware can burn (food that is…the copper will discolor and will have to be scoured with a mild cleanser to keep that shiny finish). Amy — Light travels faster than sound, which is why some people appear bright until they speak.
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Mike and I registered a couple of weeks ago. We aren’t done, but what else is new?! Anyway, we have yet to register for pots and pans… any suggestions out there as to wether aluminum or copper is better sandwiched between stainless steel? I just read a comment about copper that I didn’t like, that the person burned it… Iwas hoping the copper wouldn’t burn! gack! as well… we are going to register for some camping equipment as we enjoy doing that KA
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I have a question. I know it isn’t even time for me to register yet, but does anyone have a general rule of thumb as to how many places you can register? I am thinking of at least 3 Thanks LoRich Lori and Rich 7/16/99
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>I have a question. I know it isn’t even time for me to register yet, but does >anyone have a general rule of thumb as to how many places you can register? >I am thinking of at least 3
If you can’t keep track of ‘em all, it’s too many. And if you can’t put together a list that includes a good selection of items you love in a range of prices, it’s too few. We registered at four stores (Macys, Crate & Barrel, Target, and Home Depot) and had a duplicate of our formal tableware registry at two mail order places (Ross Simons and Barrons). Three is quite reasonable, especially if each is a different type of store (i.e., Williams-Sonoma, REI, and Bed & Bath Superstore) or if you’re duplicating your registry for the sake of cross-country guests. Holly (married Ken, 8/25/96)
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I am glad to hear that you did 4. I am thinking of Kohl’s, Target, Crate and Barrell and Carsons. Lori and Rich 7/16/99
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My memory is vague (married in May, and just coming back for a look-see), but there is a big group of department stores who are in some kind of a gift registry alliance (Macy’s and Rich’s are two of them). That way, if you are registered with any one of them, people can go to a store in their own town and pull it up. Don’t know if Dillard’s is in this group, or if there is another department store where you live that might be, but it’s worth a look. We got lots of stuff that way from out of town friends and relatives. SSM – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Travis and I have registered at Target and Dillard’s. I would like to > know how many places is it appropriate to register at?. . .There is no > Dillard’s in Maryland where my mom lives and I would like to register > at another store. > Thanks! > Brenda & Travis > 25 July 98
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> Travis and I have registered at Target and Dillard’s. I would like to > know how many places is it appropriate to register at?. . .There is no > Dillard’s in Maryland where my mom lives and I would like to register > at another store. > Thanks! > Brenda & Travis > 25 July 98
Register at as many stores as you think your guests will find useful. If that means three or four, so be it. Just remember to keep the stores updated. Amy — The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom. – William Blake
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>(Note: Choosing silverplate, rather than sterling silver, is probably a >smart >move unless you really think your average guest wants to spend $500 on a >spoon…)
$500 a spoon? In what pattern? In our silver pattern, the *retail* price of a teaspoon is $110 which means you can get it for around $60 through a discounter. That’s the average for most patterns by Wallace, Towle, Reed & Barton, Kirk Stieff, etc. You only get into the expensive expensive sterling with patterns by Christophle (oversized pieces) and weird patterns with trellises going through the fork tines. Ron Ng Knows!
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:>(Note: Choosing silverplate, rather than sterling silver, is probably a :>smart :>move unless you really think your average guest wants to spend $500 on a :>spoon…) : $500 a spoon? In what pattern? In our silver pattern, the *retail* price of a : teaspoon is $110 which means you can get it for around $60 through a : discounter. when talking about teaspoons, i don’t see much difference between 110$ and 500$, it’s a damned spoon! amy
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>when talking about teaspoons, i don’t see much difference between 110$ >and 500$, it’s a damned spoon!
You would if you were buying 12 of them. [Reader alert: If you could not care less about the price of silver, skip the rest of this. It's probably only helpful to those who want sterling.] FWIW, Ron’s off on that price too: Most of the patterns by Towle, Gorham, Reed & Barton, and Wallace can be found at a discounter for $109-$119 per four piece placesetting. More elaborate patterns (Grand Baroque or Lunt’s Eloquence) go up to $139. Just a simple teapoon can usually be found for $39 — or $24.95 on a really good promotion. Estate sterling (which include patterns that are still active today even though it might also have been your grandmother’s pattern as well) is slightly less expensive: SilverQueen often runs ads in our local paper with patterns starting at $59/placesetting for inactive patterns and including $89-99 Chantilly on a good sale. If you aren’t stuck on a certain pattern and have definite ideas about the lines of the patterns you like, you can find some great buys in estate sets. There are really only so many "themes" and a lot manufacturers have similar patterns. (Examples: Reed and Barton Eighteen Hundred, Gorham Quinette, Oneida Rushmore are all stainless patterns with a "fan out" design. I’d lump them all in the same ‘design theme’ as Lunt’s Bel Chateau and R&B 18th Century). That’s probably one great think about a classic sterling pattern: some have been around for almost 100 years, so you don’t have to worry as much about your pattern being discontinued before you fill in the missing pieces or replacing a teaspoon that didn’t survive the garbage disposal. *In general* much of the silverplate made today is not worth bringing home *over the long run*. The plating is applied much thinner today and wear is evident sooner if you actually use it on a regular basis. You can find great stainless patterns in a heavier weight that will look nicer down the road and still attractive when you pull out your ‘finest’ dinnerware for special dinners. [I'll skip my rant on Oneida's "made for bridal registries" product line of poorly made silverplate holloware that seems to take up so much floor space in local department stores.] But, whatever your choice, remember that people will remember more about the good food and great conversation at your dinner parties than what your patterns in dinnerware are! — JMcM
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> when talking about teaspoons, i don’t see much difference between 110$ > and 500$, it’s a damned spoon!>>>
I totally agree with you Amy..:) I feel that buying anything that expensive to eat from is ludicrous… Andrea
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> > Personally, I registered for 18/8 stainless (the good stuff) for formal > flatware, and more standard stainless for everyday. I hope to eventually > upgrade to silverplate, but the store I registered in doesn’t carry *any* > sterling or silverplate. Go figure. > I have not registered yet (wedding still a year and a half away), but I have > been looking around, and haven’t seen silver at *any* of the major department > stores I’ve been to! I thought a store like Macy’s would have it, but if they > do I certainly didn’t see it. Anyone that is registering for sterling or > silverplate, where are you registering? > Anna
Ross-Simons does have a small collection of Sterling flatware and cutlery. Check it out at: http://www.ross-simons.com They also have a bridal registry: through the stores, over the phone, and online. Andrea
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> > I have not registered yet (wedding still a year and a half away), but I have > been looking around, and haven’t seen silver at *any* of the major department > stores I’ve been to! I thought a store like Macy’s would have it, but if they > do I certainly didn’t see it. Anyone that is registering for sterling or > silverplate, where are you registering? > Anna
I registered for sterling at a department store. It wasn’t Macy’s, but it is a more local store like Macy’s (Dillard’s). Most department stores don’t have it out, or they very little out. Ask them if they carry it. They may have a catalog. You have to order it anyway. It is so expensive, they don’t want to chance having it out. They assume people will ask if they want it. I would ask your bridal registry consultant when you register. If they don’t carry it, you can register at Ross-Simmons or some other place like that. If someone wants to buy it for you, they can find out from your mom what pattern you would like. It is very expensive (about $160 a place setting), so there probably won’t be many people who will buy it. We got 4 place-settings, and that was even a surprise. Both my grandmothers have the same pattern, though, so that is why we went ahead and put it on our registery.
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>I have > > been looking around, and haven’t seen silver at *any* of the major >department > > stores I’ve been to! I thought a store like Macy’s would have it, but if >they > > do I certainly didn’t see it.
Well, the obvious question first: Did you ask? If in fact your local Macys doesn’t stock the sterling or silverplate, try the nearest "flagship" store in a major metro area, or a store in your toniest city. For example, ’round here all the little mall outposts of Macys don’t all display all of the "best" or less popular silver, crystal, and china; their space is more limited so they don’t stock all the things that fewer people buy — but the big store at Union Square in SF has *everything* and the store in up-market Walnut Creek has a much better selection of the more expensive brands. You can also try specialty stores; there are lots of little independent stores that sell high-end silver, crystal, etc. Most of them offer registries, and that will work for you if you have enough wealthy local guests. :-) (Note: Choosing silverplate, rather than sterling silver, is probably a smart move unless you really think your average guest wants to spend $500 on a spoon…) Holly
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>Also, I was wondering how many people are registering for silver? I >decided against it because I can remember, vividly, helping my mother clean >hers. I will have the occasion to entertain, pretty frequently, in the >future, but is silver still used in the everyday world? I just wanted to >get some opinions, as I still have *some* time to go back and register for >it. Thanks for reading!!
We’re not. We registered for medium-quality stainless steel. The most important thing to me was that it feel nice and heavy in the hand (IOW, no hollow-handled knives). I expect we’ll get some use out of it. Actually, we’ll be getting a set of inherited silver. When my mom was a little girl, her grandmother started her a silver set that she added a couple of pieces to every year. It’s been complete for 20 years or more now, and get this–MOM HAS NEVER USED IT. Mom and Grandma’s gift to me is that they’re going to polish it all (it’s pretty tarnished) and Mom is going to have the biggest piece, which I think is a small tray of some kind, engraved with my great-grandmother’s name so whomever I pass it down to will know where it came from. Will we ever use it? Probably only when we have more guests than can eat off our stainless! | http://www.cems.umn.edu/~glaser/home.htm |
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>I certainly didn’t see it. Anyone that is registering for sterling or >silverplate, where are you registering?
We registered at a local department store (now part of the Profitt’s chain I believe) which had a *limited* selection of sterling (8 patterns?), but one of them included mine. There is also a small local jewelry store in my hometown that does a registry; they had a wider selection of sterling but they also priced it at MSRP: $450 per four piece placesetting! The mall department store (chosen for out-of-state friends and family) priced it at $179. The mail order discounters had it for $119. These are the best buy and carry the broadest selection of patterns and manufacturers. Check a few of the catalogs: http://aspire.cs.uah.edu/~mccraryj/wedinfo/newchina.html We ended up getting our set from a estate dealer as a gift from a very generous aunt. The placesettings ended up being about $90 pps and serving pieces $25-$70. A number of the matching services will do a bridal registry and, depending on your pattern, older silver can actually be "better" because of the manufacturing process and amount of silver/strength of the alloy. If the prices are a turn-off but you like the look or idea of sterling or quality silverplate, don’t overlook the possibility of finding a nice set at an auction or an antique mall. Some of the older sterling patterns are incredibly detailed and there isn’t anything like that being produced today. (For silverplate, look for patterns by Alvin or by Holmes and Edwards.) I have silverplate from the 1920s that looks better than some of the Oneida s.p. pieces we received just three years ago. — JMcM
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Jodi, The online registry for JCPenney didn’t remove anything but had the list like what Lisa said. But not everyone wants/knows to look online. The printout in the stores I went to removed the purchased items. I could see how that would be annoying for guests. But here’s me with three sets of placemats and our apartment doesn’t have room for a table big enough for them to fit on!! :-) Plus the extra blenders…. – Rachel
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Josie, We didn’t register for silver/flatware because 12 years ago I bought 5 place settings of Community Plate "Bird of Paradise" (designed by Maxfield Parrish around 1910) at a garage sale. Since that time, I, my mother, and my friends buy it whenever we see it. It usually ends up costing anywhere from $20 to $45 for a place setting in good condition. IMHO, the old stuff is the nicest. I really haven’t seen any new silverplate that I like at all. Sterling seems too expensive and I won’t eat off of stainless if I have a choice (simply a personal quirk; I understand that lots of people like it). Miriam Lewis (not posting from my regular account) <<We registered at a local department store (now part of the Profitt’s chain I believe) which had a *limited* selection of sterling (8 patterns?), but one of them included mine. There is also a small local jewelry store in my hometown that does a registry; they had a wider selection of sterling but they also priced it at MSRP: $450 per four piece placesetting! The mall department store (chosen for out-of-state friends and family) priced it at $179. The mail order discounters had it for $119. These are the best buy and carry the broadest selection of patterns and manufacturers. Check a few of the catalogs: http://aspire.cs.uah.edu/~mccraryj/wedinfo/newchina.html We ended up getting our set from a estate dealer as a gift from a very generous aunt. The placesettings ended up being about $90 pps and serving pieces $25-$70. A number of the matching services will do a bridal registry and, depending on your pattern, older silver can actually be "better" because of the manufacturing process and amount of silver/strength of the alloy. If the prices are a turn-off but you like the look or idea of sterling or quality silverplate, don’t overlook the possibility of finding a nice set at an auction or an antique mall. Some of the older sterling patterns are incredibly detailed and there isn’t anything like that being produced today. (For silverplate, look for patterns by Alvin or by Holmes and Edwards.) I have silverplate from the 1920s that looks better than some of the Oneida s.p. pieces we received just three years ago.>>
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> Personally, I registered for 18/8 stainless (the good stuff) for formal > flatware, and more standard stainless for everyday. I hope to eventually > upgrade to silverplate, but the store I registered in doesn’t carry *any* > sterling or silverplate. Go figure.
I have not registered yet (wedding still a year and a half away), but I have been looking around, and haven’t seen silver at *any* of the major department stores I’ve been to! I thought a store like Macy’s would have it, but if they do I certainly didn’t see it. Anyone that is registering for sterling or silverplate, where are you registering? Anna
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I know way too many selfish brides who registered for full sets of silver and then they only received say one or two place settings and got stuck having to buy thousands of dollars worth of silver to finish their sets because stores won’t take silver flatware back normally unless you have both a receipt and you’ve never opened it. If you have cheap guests, don’t register for silver! Ron Ng Knows!
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> Also, I was wondering how many people are registering for silver? I > decided against it because I can remember, vividly, helping my mother clean > hers. I will have the occasion to entertain, pretty frequently, in the > future, but is silver still used in the everyday world?
My mom and sis-in-law have both cottoned onto a good compromise. They both have silverplate flatware that they use for both everyday and formal dining. Using it frequently means not having to clean it as often, and that over time it will develop a unique sheen due to frequent handling. Personally, I registered for 18/8 stainless (the good stuff) for formal flatware, and more standard stainless for everyday. I hope to eventually upgrade to silverplate, but the store I registered in doesn’t carry *any* sterling or silverplate. Go figure. –jeniphir "The last time I was in a graveyard was after a Cure concert in high school. The clove cigarettes made it seem so much more festive." –Jon Cryer on some WB show VIRTUAL YARD SALE: http://www.cris.com/~jeniphir
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> The trick to registering is to pick gifts in all price ranges. If most people > in your area spend about $100 on a gift, then it is OK if that would be just > one wok. Pick your favorite things, and don’t feel selfish. Its just a list > of things you like that gives people ideas on what to buy you, and prevents you > from getting 13 toasters, and 4 cusinarts.
To add to the last statement… We got 3 of the (exact) same blenders. One was given at the bridal shower, and the other two were wedding gifts. It had been marked as received on the registry since before the shower. I’d suggest registering somewhere that actually *removes* purchased items from the list. JC Penney did remove them. We ended up with only a few things left – it looked much nicer than a print out with little order to it, including the things we’d already received (or were going to receive). Just a thought. – Rachel
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>I’d suggest >registering somewhere that actually *removes* purchased items from the list. >JC Penney did remove them.
I was actually a little irritated when I saw that JCP removed the purchased items from the list. I could see someone thinking, "Wouldn’t it be thoughtful to get the HC a set of placemats that coordinate with their dishes" and not knowing that the HC picked out a set of placemats and already received them. Jodi G.
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Maybe it just depends on how the store clerk handles it? I used JCP for my registry, and nothing was actually removed. There was a "Would like" column with the total number of the desired item, and a "Still Needs" which was reduced to 0 once the items had been purchased. I really liked the JCP registry, and would recommend it. Lisa – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I’d suggest >registering somewhere that actually *removes* purchased items from the list. >JC Penney did remove them. >I was actually a little irritated when I saw that JCP removed the purchased >items from the list. I could see someone thinking, "Wouldn’t it be >thoughtful to get the HC a set of placemats that coordinate with their >dishes" and not knowing that the HC picked out a set of placemats and >already received them. >Jodi G.
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*Also, I was wondering how many people are registering for silver? I *decided against it because I can remember, vividly, helping my mother clean *hers. I will have the occasion to entertain, pretty frequently, in the *future, but is silver still used in the everyday world? I just wanted to I know how you feel re: feeling like a brat about registering. I have similar feelings, but have caved into the registry thing because *everyone* who has been told of my engagement has asked about where I’m registered. Regarding the silver, I had fully planned on registering for it. My mom uses her silver for every Pesach seder, Thanksgiving dinner, and other large family gathering – at least 2 or 3 times a year – and I would forsee myself doing similarly. However, I’ve been given an extremely generous gift of silver service already, so I didn’t end up registering for it. – "So that’s 2 T-1s and a newsfeed….would you like clues with that?" Net Access…The NSP for ISPs….The NOC that rocks around the clock.
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> Also, I was wondering how many people are registering for silver? I > decided against it because I can remember, vividly, helping my mother clean > hers. I will have the occasion to entertain, pretty frequently, in the > future, but is silver still used in the everyday world? I just wanted to > get some opinions, as I still have *some* time to go back and register for > it. Thanks for reading!!
Ah – I love my silver! The great thing about sterling is that the more you use it the less frequently you have to polish it! Since we don’t have a dishwasher, it doesn’t matter if it has to be hand-washed or not – everything gets hand-washed! But, if you are concerned about the prices of your registry items, you might want to skip the silver! (I got mine at an antique store – much better prices than retail and they already have a gorgeous patina.) -Tara
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I just had to laugh! I know how you feel, but there is one thing to remember as you look at your list. It is a list of what you like. Not necessarily what you "deserve" to have. You won’t get everything on your list, not even close, probably. And certain people will surprise you. My fiance and I decided that we would pick a few things that we didn’t expect to get because they weren’t for "the house" or "our future", simply so that people could get an idea of what our personalities were. (I picked a lenox crystal panther stretching, and Jason picked a hand painted egg, painted like the Rabbit from Alice in Wonderland–Extravagant, and not exactly purposeful other than to enjoy) And guess what! I got my cat, from someone who told me she was happy she didn’t have to buy one more stupid vase! Hah! I didn’t choose a bone china pattern, mostly because my lovable fiance is a big clutz and partly because we live in a condo and don’t have a formal dining room, so why pick something formal now? Instead I went with the Casual Images collection from Lenox. I LOVE it. You can microwave them, and they are dishwasher safe. They are practically Jason proof! And they are beautiful–I had Thanksgiving here, and people kept raving! (Ok, so maybe I’m a good cook, but it still looked good on the plates) <grin> Silver? No way! Stainless steel is more my style. Who has the time to polish forks all day??? The trick to registering is to pick gifts in all price ranges. If most people in your area spend about $100 on a gift, then it is OK if that would be just one wok. Pick your favorite things, and don’t feel selfish. Its just a list of things you like that gives people ideas on what to buy you, and prevents you from getting 13 toasters, and 4 cusinarts. Regards, Pam – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > brat! The prices for some things I registered for were OUTRAGEOUS. For > instance, I picked out a set of Farberware pots/pans which were about > $200, not too bad, but for the wok to go with it, $100, the chicken fryer, > $100…….I couldn’t believe it. In the end I ended up deleting several > items off my list because of the outrageous pricing. > Also, I was wondering how many people are registering for silver? I > decided against it because I can remember, vividly, helping my mother clean > hers. I will have the occasion to entertain, pretty frequently, in the > future, but is silver still used in the everyday world? I just wanted to > get some opinions, as I still have *some* time to go back and register for > it. Thanks for reading!! > Leila > (& Larry, 11/21/98)
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>Leila: >You can go ahead and register for everything, and don’t worry about the >prices! I know that many people will get the list of your gifts and either >decide to go halves with another person or they’ll take the list to a store >that might have the items you are requesting at a much more reasonable price >(I live near a whole bunch of outlet malls, and I am forever going there >with friends who have to buy gifts that were outrageously priced in >department stores).
Not sure where you registered, but some stores have a completion deal. Many stores keep the registery for a yera and will give you a discount on the items that you have left. >Also, I don’t have silver. I never registered for silver. Somehow, I ended >up with silver serving pieces and a silver tea set. After about two years >(I’m in year ten!), I gave the tea set to someone who obviously had more >time to keep it polished than I did. The serving pieces are wrapped up in >paper in one of my kitchen drawers. I think I used them for my first >Thanksgiving dinner, and not again since. If you think you will have >occasion for very formal entertaining, you might need the opulence of the >silver pieces. When we entertain, it’s usually friends and family coming >over for a BBQ, a birthday dinner, etc. If I want formal, I go out!
We got sterling silver flatware. It’s really nice and not as tough to keep clean. — Teej http://www.panix.com/~teej
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> Also, I was wondering how many people are registering for silver? I > decided against it because I can remember, vividly, helping my mother clean > hers. I will have the occasion to entertain, pretty frequently, in the > future, but is silver still used in the everyday world? I just wanted to > get some opinions, as I still have *some* time to go back and register for > it. Thanks for reading!!
We didn’t – too expensive for a start. We registered for some reasonably nice stainless steel cuttelry instead.
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Leila: You can go ahead and register for everything, and don’t worry about the prices! I know that many people will get the list of your gifts and either decide to go halves with another person or they’ll take the list to a store that might have the items you are requesting at a much more reasonable price (I live near a whole bunch of outlet malls, and I am forever going there with friends who have to buy gifts that were outrageously priced in department stores). Also, I don’t have silver. I never registered for silver. Somehow, I ended up with silver serving pieces and a silver tea set. After about two years (I’m in year ten!), I gave the tea set to someone who obviously had more time to keep it polished than I did. The serving pieces are wrapped up in paper in one of my kitchen drawers. I think I used them for my first Thanksgiving dinner, and not again since. If you think you will have occasion for very formal entertaining, you might need the opulence of the silver pieces. When we entertain, it’s usually friends and family coming over for a BBQ, a birthday dinner, etc. If I want formal, I go out! Anna – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >brat! The prices for some things I registered for were OUTRAGEOUS. For >instance, I picked out a set of Farberware pots/pans which were about >$200, not too bad, but for the wok to go with it, $100, the chicken fryer, >$100…….I couldn’t believe it. In the end I ended up deleting several >items off my list because of the outrageous pricing. >Also, I was wondering how many people are registering for silver? I >decided against it because I can remember, vividly, helping my mother clean >hers. I will have the occasion to entertain, pretty frequently, in the >future, but is silver still used in the everyday world? I just wanted to >get some opinions, as I still have *some* time to go back and register for >it. Thanks for reading!! >Leila >(& Larry, 11/21/98)
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brat! The prices for some things I registered for were OUTRAGEOUS. For instance, I picked out a set of Farberware pots/pans which were about $200, not too bad, but for the wok to go with it, $100, the chicken fryer, $100…….I couldn’t believe it. In the end I ended up deleting several items off my list because of the outrageous pricing. Also, I was wondering how many people are registering for silver? I decided against it because I can remember, vividly, helping my mother clean hers. I will have the occasion to entertain, pretty frequently, in the future, but is silver still used in the everyday world? I just wanted to get some opinions, as I still have *some* time to go back and register for it. Thanks for reading!! Leila (& Larry, 11/21/98)
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Hi, I am just curious as to how many people register at a given location, versus letting guests buy whatever they want. Any info about registering would be greatly appreciated: Good places to register? Do people ever register at more than one location? Bad experiences with registering? Thank you in advance Chris
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Hi, I am just curious as to how many people register at a given location, versus letting guests buy whatever they want. Any info about registering would be greatly appreciated: Good places to register? Do people ever register at more than one location? Bad experiences with registering? Thank you in advance Chris The advice we were given, and I think its probably pretty apt, is that if we didn’t register we’d get 50 crystal bowls and 40 sets of candle sticks… You’ll get quite a few of those no matter what you do (and its useful to get a few — but we do have a lifetime supply of vases now, and we didn’t register for any…). I think those are the things peoples minds run to when they think of wedding presents — particularly if they don’t have much info about what your tastes would be or what you already have. And I think many people would be just as happy giving you flatware as giving you a vase (after all its something that they know you’ll use) — but they have to know what kind to get you. I think many guests are made more comfortable with registeries. They’re going to spend a fair bit on money, so they want to get you something you want/need but they can’t really ask anyone cause it gets into sticky guess work about how much they’re going to spend etc. We ended up registering in 3 places (Bullocks/Macy’s, Lands’ End and Ross-Simons), with some overlap in what we registered for. In general we only mentioned two to anyone who asked – Bullock’s and Lands’ End for local people, Ross Simons and Lands’ End for out-of-town people. We had no trouble with the overlap causing us to get duplicates (not that we didn’t get duplicates… poeple don’t always tell stores what they end up buying…). You may not want to register at too many places — I found the shower invitation for an acquaintence that listed 4 local department stores a bit off-putting… We didn’t have any "bad" experiences — Ross-Simons got on my MIL’s nerves some, but when push came to shove and they had to take back 8 place setting of china because the manufacturer was having color problems, they didn’t bat an eye. For Ross-Simons and other mail order places I’d advice getting a list of exactly what you want and what the manufacturer calls it before you try and register — I got very confused with goblets, and iced beverage glasses and balloon goblets over the phone (I’d only seen 2 of a seemingly infinite choice…). For department stores I’d suggest going a few times and getting a pretty clear idea of what you want — some are happy to let you wander ’round the store with a list, others seem to want to "advise" you on everything, and they have fairly upscale ideas of what "most of our brides" do… One last bit of advice — make sure you register for things in a reasonable price range… Having a few pricy items is fine (surprising people will give them to you…) but you want a lot to be in the range of mere mortals. One wedding I went to, the couple had register for china that was $150 per place setting, flatware that was $80 and crystal that was $35 per glass — I felt a little chinzy at the idea of giving one wine glass (in the end a friend and I went in together on the $90 mixer…). Anyway, I hope this helps. Dealing with the stores can be a bit annoying at times, but I think its worth it in terms of finding yourselves with presents where you say "Let’s use Laurel’s tablecloth tonight", rather than "Did we put Aunt Sally’s candlesticks in the basement or in the attic…" Hope this helps — Good luck — Rachel D.
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*Another registering question. I keep seeing references to people *registering way in advance of the wedding. I was really baffled to read *suggestions that engagement gifts should be bought of the wedding registry. *Do people really register as soon as they get engaged? Why? I thought that *if you registered too soon you would run into problems with patterns and *products being discontinued. We registered early (a year in advance!) because: -my parents were driving me CRAZY, insisting that we register -random "long lost" family members were, upon hearing the news, demanding to know where we were registered -there wasn’t going to be any other convenient time to do it! We got engaged early 8/98. Since school started back up in September and there would be NO time off of school or vacation time prior to the wedding in 8/99, it was register during 8/98 or not register at all. – "So that’s 2 T-1s and a newsfeed….would you like clues with that?" Net Access…The NSP for ISPs….The NOC that rocks around the clock.
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>Just another note on why to register for stuff that you don’t think you >will actually receive…a lot of registries offer "completion >incentives," which means if you do not receive certain gifts (especially >flatware, crystal, china, and sometimes stuff like cookware), the store >will give you a discount if you "complete" your registry within a year. >Rob and I registered for lots of linens that we were sure we wouldn’t get, >knowing that we could go back after the wedding and buy them ourselves. >We get a 10% discount, on top of being able to wait for sales. Check with >your registries to see if the store has this type of program. >Peggy
-Amy (marrying Eric 4/8/00) We’ve heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the Complete Works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true. -Robert Wilensky
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Another registering question. I keep seeing references to people registering way in advance of the wedding. I was really baffled to read suggestions that engagement gifts should be bought of the wedding registry. Do people really register as soon as they get engaged? Why? I thought that if you registered too soon you would run into problems with patterns and products being discontinued. I was planning on registering a week or two before sending out the invitations. Should I do it sooner? Ugh. I hate shopping and I am dreading the whole experience. Maybe it is better to get it over with. But I do not want to deal with having stuff being discontinued and then having to go back and do it again. Once is more than enough. Julie
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That is a VERY good idea!
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Julie, No, you do not have to register right away. Many times engagement gifts are bought pretty close to the wedding (within a few months), like around the time to announce your engagement in the paper. We really didn’t receive many engagement gifts, and none were off our registry. You are right about if you register too early, things will change. This is not so much true for china, crystal, and flatware, but it is true for linens. All linens change with the seasons. If you register more than 4 months before the wedding, the season will change and so will many colors and patterns of linens (maybe the ones you chose, maybe not, but why take the chance? It happened to us). You just need to register before your pre-wedding parties, like showers and stuff. I would say 2-3 months is plenty early. No one will buy your wedding gift that early, but if your shower is that early, you want your registry to be complete. Even if you don’t like to shop, I think you will enjoy this. It is different than shopping because you don’t have to buy anything (you have to have money). What you can do is get catalogs with china and flatware patterns in them and take them home and look through them. I suggest you go to the store you want to register at (or think you want to) and just look at china one day. Pick the ones you like. Discuss it with your fiance. We had to compromise a little. Then, go look at crystal. Then, flatware. Do this over months time. You can create a list of patterns and colors you like and want. When you have composed your list, THEN go register. It will go a lot faster. When the woman asks if you need a blender, you can say yes or no according to your list with no arguement. Decide how many of everything too. China, crystal, flateware (formal and informal if you choose to do both), towels, sheets, pillows, table linens, etc… If you two decide on colors you like for each room, then it will go a lot faster. Just stretch it out, and then it won’t seem like such a big task. I hope this helps take some strain off the registering process. It really can be fun picking stuff out together. I always had to go find a few things I liked, then take him later and ask which ones he liked best because he wouldn’t look at them all. He got bored very fast. Good Luck!! If you need any other help, e-mail me! :) Kelli – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Another registering question. I keep seeing references to people > registering way in advance of the wedding. I was really baffled to read > suggestions that engagement gifts should be bought of the wedding registry. > Do people really register as soon as they get engaged? Why? I thought that > if you registered too soon you would run into problems with patterns and > products being discontinued. > I was planning on registering a week or two before sending out the > invitations. Should I do it sooner? Ugh. I hate shopping and I am > dreading the whole experience. Maybe it is better to get it over with. But > I do not want to deal with having stuff being discontinued and then having > to go back and do it again. Once is more than enough. > Julie
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Just another note on why to register for stuff that you don’t think you will actually receive…a lot of registries offer "completion incentives," which means if you do not receive certain gifts (especially flatware, crystal, china, and sometimes stuff like cookware), the store will give you a discount if you "complete" your registry within a year. Rob and I registered for lots of linens that we were sure we wouldn’t get, knowing that we could go back after the wedding and buy them ourselves. We get a 10% discount, on top of being able to wait for sales. Check with your registries to see if the store has this type of program. Peggy – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Newgroups: alt.wedding > First, just because you register for it does not mean that someone will buy > it for you or has to buy it for you. You should certainly register for the > set that you really want no matter what the price because if you register for > something cheaper and you don’t really want it, then you will be stuck with > something you don’t really want. Can they not buy pieces separately? Our > cookware set was all separate, so we bought a skillet, then the medium pot, > etc… We had everything we needed before we got married, though. My > husband only buys the good stuff, so he had almost everything. > Second, people do sometimes go in together for gifts, but not really often. > It just depends on your family. The most expensive gift we got was around > $300 (US), I think. I would just register for it. If you don’t get it, you > can buy it yourself with the money you get. We got a lot of money and bought > our comforter and more expensive things like that that we wanted with it. > You also may return things to that store and get store credit. We had that > happen some too. > Kelli > I have a question that I’m hoping someone might be able to help me with. > Paul and I have spent the last few days going through the "registering > thing". In doing so, we were faced with a bit of a dilemma. We both > "really" need a good cookware set. The set we have now is on its last > legs. We have some cast iron stuff that we use for camping, but a good > cookware set would be a welcomed gift. Our question is this: What do > most people spend on a wedding gift? (Outside of family). If you were > going to a wedding and buying a gift, what would you spend? > The set that Paul has picked out is $549 (Canadian), while the set I’ve > picked out is $369. Both have lifetime guarantees. Both are stainless > steel, non-stick, blah, blah, blah… and our hope is that some of our > family members will go in on this gift together. We realize that this is > an expensive item, but we really need a good set that will last us many > years. > Are we aiming too high? > THanks for any feedback you can offer. > Shelley, to Paul > August 7, 1999 > – SEE OUR WEDDING WEBSITE – > www.chebucto.ns.ca/~ah054/Profile.html
_/ _/ _/ _/ _/ _/ _/ Duke University _/ _/ _/ _/ _/ _/ _/ Studies
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First, just because you register for it does not mean that someone will buy it for you or has to buy it for you. You should certainly register for the set that you really want no matter what the price because if you register for something cheaper and you don’t really want it, then you will be stuck with something you don’t really want. Can they not buy pieces separately? Our cookware set was all separate, so we bought a skillet, then the medium pot, etc… We had everything we needed before we got married, though. My husband only buys the good stuff, so he had almost everything. Second, people do sometimes go in together for gifts, but not really often. It just depends on your family. The most expensive gift we got was around $300 (US), I think. I would just register for it. If you don’t get it, you can buy it yourself with the money you get. We got a lot of money and bought our comforter and more expensive things like that that we wanted with it. You also may return things to that store and get store credit. We had that happen some too. Kelli – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > I have a question that I’m hoping someone might be able to help me with. > Paul and I have spent the last few days going through the "registering > thing". In doing so, we were faced with a bit of a dilemma. We both > "really" need a good cookware set. The set we have now is on its last > legs. We have some cast iron stuff that we use for camping, but a good > cookware set would be a welcomed gift. Our question is this: What do > most people spend on a wedding gift? (Outside of family). If you were > going to a wedding and buying a gift, what would you spend? > The set that Paul has picked out is $549 (Canadian), while the set I’ve > picked out is $369. Both have lifetime guarantees. Both are stainless > steel, non-stick, blah, blah, blah… and our hope is that some of our > family members will go in on this gift together. We realize that this is > an expensive item, but we really need a good set that will last us many > years. > Are we aiming too high? > THanks for any feedback you can offer. > Shelley, to Paul > August 7, 1999 > – SEE OUR WEDDING WEBSITE – > www.chebucto.ns.ca/~ah054/Profile.html
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As it turns out, my FMIL called me today. We had a chat about the pots and pans she said that she’d spread the word among our close family members so she suggested that we not put these on the registry. She is sure the family will pick them up as a group gift. That would be so lovely. On Mon, 7 Jun 1999, Sara-anne Taylor > I agree. Even though it might be cheaper to buy the whole set rather than each item individually, > you want to register for items with a price that you think your guests would want to spend. We > registered for items all the way from $1 up to $500, but concentrated on things around $50 > (American). > The high quality sets tend to come open stock. They also come as sets. Register for each item > individually. If you get only part of the set, return it for credit, chances are good that > you’ll have enough credit to get the whole set.
Shelley, to Paul August 7, 1999 – SEE OUR WEDDING WEBSITE – www.chebucto.ns.ca/~ah054/Profile.html
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I agree. Even though it might be cheaper to buy the whole set rather than each item individually, you want to register for items with a price that you think your guests would want to spend. We registered for items all the way from $1 up to $500, but concentrated on things around $50 (American). – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> The high quality sets tend to come open stock. They also come as sets. Register for each item > individually. If you get only part of the set, return it for credit, chances are good that > you’ll have enough credit to get the whole set.
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That is a tad high for someone not closely related to you, although it’s in the price range we have spent on nieces and nephews. However, many/most cookware sets are available by the piece, even if it’s more expensive in the long run. Another, better option you could hope for is to receive gift certificates from the store that you can combine to buy one of the sets. Or you could return things to the store that you may not need as much and purchase one of the sets with the credit for returns. gloria p – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > I have a question that I’m hoping someone might be able to help me with. > Paul and I have spent the last few days going through the "registering > thing". In doing so, we were faced with a bit of a dilemma. We both > "really" need a good cookware set. The set we have now is on its last > legs. We have some cast iron stuff that we use for camping, but a good > cookware set would be a welcomed gift. Our question is this: What do > most people spend on a wedding gift? (Outside of family). If you were > going to a wedding and buying a gift, what would you spend? > The set that Paul has picked out is $549 (Canadian), while the set I’ve > picked out is $369. Both have lifetime guarantees. Both are stainless > steel, non-stick, blah, blah, blah… and our hope is that some of our > family members will go in on this gift together. We realize that this is > an expensive item, but we really need a good set that will last us many > years. > Are we aiming too high? > THanks for any feedback you can offer. > Shelley, to Paul > August 7, 1999 > – SEE OUR WEDDING WEBSITE – > www.chebucto.ns.ca/~ah054/Profile.html
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> Shelly, > Have you thought about registering for open stock items? That way people > can pay as much or as little as they want. Also, where are you registering? > I know The Bay can be quite sticky about needing to put down namebrands, > etc. but I was able to get around that on a few items. I also told my > bridesmaids and family to tell anyone who asks that I’m not too concerned > about the actual brand names that appear on my registry – it’s more the idea > the that it’s an item I need.
Well, this particular set… um, I"m not sure if they have open stock. It’s called Governor’s Table. (The set I picked out is "Ware-Ever"). They probably are open stock pieces. We’re registered at The Bay. I’ll have to call and check. > More to the point of your question – my FSIL received an entire set of > Paderno cookware from her MIL as a shower gift – so if you register for the > whole set there may be someone out there who can and will buy the whole > thing. My own wedding gift price range is $50 – $100 CDN depending on how > well I know the bride and groom.
Yeah, I figured in or around $50-$100. That’s what we’ve given in the last year. My girlfriend (closest) was given $80, while another friend (not so close) was given $50. I always feel that’s a significant sum of money for a friend. if it were family I would imagine I’d spend upwards of $100. But everyone in my family is married, so I guess I don’t have that to worry about. Thanks for the suggestions Shelley, to Paul August 7, 1999 – SEE OUR WEDDING WEBSITE – www.chebucto.ns.ca/~ah054/Profile.html
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>f an "old married woman" (28+ years) can offer some advice, it would be >this: forget the set!
Ann, Sure hope they don’t mind an old married woman’s opinion. I’ve been married 25 years on July 27. (although I don’t feel old and it doesn’t seem so long ago I was planning my own wedding) We have lots to share with them. We didn’t get to this point in married life without picking up a little wisdom along the way. I am helping with the planning of my daughter’s wedding and have found a wealth of information on this NG. I truly look forward to reading this NG a couple of times a day to see what new I can learn from these postings. So thanks to all of you young brides and grooms. May you have a long and beautiful marriages. Joyce
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>The set that Paul has picked out is $549 (Canadian), while the set I’ve >picked out is $369. Both have lifetime guarantees. Both are stainless >steel, non-stick, blah, blah, blah.
Can the pieces be purchased individually? I notice that many of the quality sets can be. Put the hint out that that is what you really need and you will probably at least get part of the set. In my family and at my work place people prefer going in on really nice gifts as apposed to a bunch of small items. So go for it.
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Shelly, Have you thought about registering for open stock items? That way people can pay as much or as little as they want. Also, where are you registering? I know The Bay can be quite sticky about needing to put down namebrands, etc. but I was able to get around that on a few items. I also told my bridesmaids and family to tell anyone who asks that I’m not too concerned about the actual brand names that appear on my registry – it’s more the idea the that it’s an item I need. More to the point of your question – my FSIL received an entire set of Paderno cookware from her MIL as a shower gift – so if you register for the whole set there may be someone out there who can and will buy the whole thing. My own wedding gift price range is $50 – $100 CDN depending on how well I know the bride and groom. Hope this helps, Kate
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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >I have a question that I’m hoping someone might be able to help me with. >Paul and I have spent the last few days going through the "registering >thing". In doing so, we were faced with a bit of a dilemma. We both >"really" need a good cookware set. The set we have now is on its last >legs. We have some cast iron stuff that we use for camping, but a good >cookware set would be a welcomed gift. Our question is this: What do >most people spend on a wedding gift? (Outside of family). If you were >going to a wedding and buying a gift, what would you spend? >The set that Paul has picked out is $549 (Canadian), while the set I’ve >picked out is $369. Both have lifetime guarantees. Both are stainless >steel, non-stick, blah, blah, blah… and our hope is that some of our >family members will go in on this gift together. We realize that this is >an expensive item, but we really need a good set that will last us many >years. >Are we aiming too high? >THanks for any feedback you can offer. >Shelley, to Paul
Shelley, If an "old married woman" (28+ years) can offer some advice, it would be this: forget the set! Look for similar cookware in "open stock" pieces and register for the ~pieces~ you will use. My first "set" was a non-stick "set" (you know, 9 matching pieces including lids). What I actually ~used~ was the two smallest saucepans. What I could have used was TWO MORE each of those two sizes. Later on, we replaced that stuff with a great "set" (as in "we got the pieces we use in the quantity we need them") of a heavy cast aluminum (restaurant-type). What I actually USE these days (mostly) is my cast iron skillets (for frying/sauteeing) and the pots with lids that we bought ourselves because the sizes fit our lifestyle. I’d suggest that you and Paul assess your cooking styles and look for good quality in "open stock." (Some family members may still go together and get you the whole shebang, but you won’t be storing odd sizes that you never use.) Don’t forget to look at the "grill" pans! Just one old wife’s opinion. Ann
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I have a question that I’m hoping someone might be able to help me with. Paul and I have spent the last few days going through the "registering thing". In doing so, we were faced with a bit of a dilemma. We both "really" need a good cookware set. The set we have now is on its last legs. We have some cast iron stuff that we use for camping, but a good cookware set would be a welcomed gift. Our question is this: What do most people spend on a wedding gift? (Outside of family). If you were going to a wedding and buying a gift, what would you spend? The set that Paul has picked out is $549 (Canadian), while the set I’ve picked out is $369. Both have lifetime guarantees. Both are stainless steel, non-stick, blah, blah, blah… and our hope is that some of our family members will go in on this gift together. We realize that this is an expensive item, but we really need a good set that will last us many years. Are we aiming too high? THanks for any feedback you can offer. Shelley, to Paul August 7, 1999 – SEE OUR WEDDING WEBSITE – www.chebucto.ns.ca/~ah054/Profile.html
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In our experience, no one had any problems ordering online. No one expressed a fear of ordering online. It depends on the people, I suppose. Cheers, Cheryl
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I’m finding, more and more, that many more people than expected just won’t > buy things online. My aunt, for example, whose company (she owns it) has a > web site, has been trying to find the stuff I registered for in a store near > where she lives. The prices she’s finding are outrageous, but she’s afraid > to buy online. She also doesn’t want to buy something sight unseen so she > won’t buy anything over the phone. I’m sure she’s not the only one of my > friends and family who are suffering this dilema. > Beware if you register solely online, some of your less computer savvy > guests may become stressed about what to get you. > — > Melissa > [The big day is March 18, 2001] > There are also select internet sites where you can register completely > online (that is, if you know what it is you’d like to register for). DH > and > I never set foot in a store to register… and our guests were able to > order > via the internet as well! It was great since we live so far from any > large > centre and have such demanding time schedules. > It’s an option to consider. I’d list a link to stores offering this but > we > used Canadian chains so it may not be of much help to you. > Best to you, > Cheryl > > I am getting married September 1, 2001. I was wondering if you think > > Memorial Day weekend would be too late to register. My fianc
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([Yahoudi]) writes: > (I’m not sure there are any hen people coming >to our wedding, but they probably wouldn’t like the lobster release, either.)
you ARE still doing the lobster release, aren’t you? It’ll look great in the pictures. Just make sure you get the lobsters that won’t stain your dress. koa Madison, AL
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> Why are these necessarily Southern things? > Eliza (& John 4/10/99) > FROM GEORGIA
In the North, we usually don’t have a groom’s cake.
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Birdseed feel out of favour because it hurts hen people throw it at you. Then bubbles become the thing to do but if you don’t get the right kind it will stain the dress, I think the latest and greatest idea now is throing flower petals. Me- I’m having the ceremony and the reception in the same place and not making a big exit.. If I don’t leave, no one can throw things at me – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->Uncooked rice can be dangerous for small animals to eat. It’s also >illegal in Indiana to throw rice, so alot of people substitute birdseed. >Christine >And now rice is illegal to throw (at least in Massachusetts)… what does >that portent I wonder … hmmmmm >Gary C. Stenstrom >Interactive Online Wedding Planner >www.onlinebrides.com >>I didn’t mean to give the impression that I believe in superstitions. >Quite >>the opposite! I showed my husband a picture of my dress, which is supposed >to >>be a no-no. We had all our pictures made before the wedding, so he saw me >>before I walked down the aisle, another no-no. I can’t think of one >>superstition we clinged to at all. >>But if the original poster was simply looking for some of these old wedding >>wives’ tales and superstitions, here are two more. . . >>Throwing rice means fertility >>Tying cans to the car scares off evil spirits (of course they were >origianlly >>tied to a buggy or whatever means the B&G used) >–
– Teej http://www.panix.com/~teej
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Is the bride allowed to do that?? What if she doesn’t dream of the groom??
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: Birdseed feel out of favour because it hurts hen people [snip] I would have thought that hen people would really like birdseed being thrown at weddings. (I’m not sure there are any hen people coming to our wedding, but they probably wouldn’t like the lobster release, either.) (Just a little humor for a Friday. Apologies to Teej, but I really couldn’t help myself….) Jill
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> Uncooked rice can be dangerous for small animals to eat. It’s also > illegal in Indiana to throw rice, so alot of people substitute birdseed.
Another option is throwing grass seed.
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->And now rice is illegal to throw (at least in Massachusetts)… what does >that portent I wonder … hmmmmm >Gary C. Stenstrom >Interactive Online Wedding Planner >www.onlinebrides.com >I didn’t mean to give the impression that I believe in superstitions. >Quite >the opposite! I showed my husband a picture of my dress, which is supposed >to >be a no-no. We had all our pictures made before the wedding, so he saw me >before I walked down the aisle, another no-no. I can’t think of one >superstition we clinged to at all. >But if the original poster was simply looking for some of these old wedding >wives’ tales and superstitions, here are two more. . . >Throwing rice means fertility >Tying cans to the car scares off evil spirits (of course they were >origianlly >tied to a buggy or whatever means the B&G used)
Newsgroups: alt.wedding Summary: Expires: Sender: Followup-To: Distribution: Organization: Indiana University, Bloomington Keywords: Cc: Uncooked rice can be dangerous for small animals to eat. It’s also illegal in Indiana to throw rice, so alot of people substitute birdseed. Christine – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->And now rice is illegal to throw (at least in Massachusetts)… what does >that portent I wonder … hmmmmm >Gary C. Stenstrom >Interactive Online Wedding Planner >www.onlinebrides.com >I didn’t mean to give the impression that I believe in superstitions. >Quite >the opposite! I showed my husband a picture of my dress, which is supposed >to >be a no-no. We had all our pictures made before the wedding, so he saw me >before I walked down the aisle, another no-no. I can’t think of one >superstition we clinged to at all. >But if the original poster was simply looking for some of these old wedding >wives’ tales and superstitions, here are two more. . . >Throwing rice means fertility >Tying cans to the car scares off evil spirits (of course they were >origianlly >tied to a buggy or whatever means the B&G used)
–
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Uncooked rice can be dangerous for small animals to eat. It’s also illegal in Indiana to throw rice, so alot of people substitute birdseed. Christine – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->And now rice is illegal to throw (at least in Massachusetts)… what does >that portent I wonder … hmmmmm >Gary C. Stenstrom >Interactive Online Wedding Planner >www.onlinebrides.com >I didn’t mean to give the impression that I believe in superstitions. >Quite >the opposite! I showed my husband a picture of my dress, which is supposed >to >be a no-no. We had all our pictures made before the wedding, so he saw me >before I walked down the aisle, another no-no. I can’t think of one >superstition we clinged to at all. >But if the original poster was simply looking for some of these old wedding >wives’ tales and superstitions, here are two more. . . >Throwing rice means fertility >Tying cans to the car scares off evil spirits (of course they were >origianlly >tied to a buggy or whatever means the B&G used)
–
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> I am very interested in different superstitions regarding weddings. I have > done a search and I only found one site that had several superstitions. I > know the standard something old, something new, something borrowed, > something blue. But are there any others that anyone knows of?
I’ve always thought it was funny that I’ve heard a million times that it’s lucky to have rain on your wedding day *and* "happy the bride the sun shines on." Just goes to show (IMO) that whatever goes wrong with a wedding, someone there will inevitably declare it (somehow) a good omen. –jeniphir — "I think I should like to rage | Goth code and Whore code through life–this orthodox creeping | available on request. is too tame for me." | –Speranza Francesca Wilde | http://www.cris.com/~jeniphir
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take the first step into church with your right foot. ann
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>>I am very interested in different superstitions regarding weddings. I have >done a search and I only found one site that had several superstitions. I >know the standard something old, something new, something borrowed, >something blue. But are there any others that anyone knows of?
The site that I know of might be the one that you have already found, but here it is anyway: http://www.weddings.co.uk/info/tradsup.htm Jackie Scott September 11, 1999
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And now rice is illegal to throw (at least in Massachusetts)… what does that portent I wonder … hmmmmm Gary C. Stenstrom Interactive Online Wedding Planner www.onlinebrides.com – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I didn’t mean to give the impression that I believe in superstitions. Quite >the opposite! I showed my husband a picture of my dress, which is supposed to >be a no-no. We had all our pictures made before the wedding, so he saw me >before I walked down the aisle, another no-no. I can’t think of one >superstition we clinged to at all. >But if the original poster was simply looking for some of these old wedding >wives’ tales and superstitions, here are two more. . . >Throwing rice means fertility >Tying cans to the car scares off evil spirits (of course they were origianlly >tied to a buggy or whatever means the B&G used)
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> I am very interested in different superstitions regarding weddings. I have > done a search and I only found one site that had several superstitions. I > know the standard something old, something new, something borrowed, > something blue. But are there any others that anyone knows of? > Thanks for any info, > Anja
I knew one bride that had a stand-in during the rehearsal. I assumed this was related to some superstition. We just went through all the motions with a stand-in bride (the wife of a groomsman) as the real bride-to-be stood back and watched. It actually worked great because the bride had an audience-view of the wedding "layout." I have also heard "Change the Name and Not the Letter, Marry for Worse and Not for Better." In other words, if you marry a person with the same last initial as yours, YIPES! I have heard that rain on your wedding day means a fertile marriage baby-wise. At a bridal shower, every gift ribbon you break is supposed to be one more baby you’ll have. This is of course all hogwash. Even so, I cringe when someone opens an umbrella inside. Sure it’s stupid. But what can I say?!? — KZ * * I have a wedding page with a collection of ideas for small weddings, * theme weddings, and destination weddings : * * http://www.umich.edu/~kzaruba/wedding.html *
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>Superstitions are just that, superstitions. We have been married 30+ yrs and it >poured during the ceremony and the reception. Many of the ideas, black cats, >cracks in the sidewalk have power if YOU let them have power. Some are common >sense, don’t walk under a ladder, someone could fall on you, etc. >It is amazing all these things are going around.
I agree that they are just superstitions, and I don’t take them seriously. But sometimes they can be fun. My fiance won’t see my dress before the wedding. If he did, would that have any bearing on the quality of our relationship? Certainly not, but we both think its a fun thing to do anyway. I’ll probably put the sixpence in my shoe too. Would I be worried without it? No. But I have a good friend in England who’s sending it to me and it is a fun thing for us to share. Diane — May 9th, 1998 is approaching quickly…… Will you be ready?
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> Superstitions are just that, superstitions. We have been married 30+ yrs and it > poured during the ceremony and the reception. Many of the ideas, black cats, > cracks in the sidewalk have power if YOU let them have power. Some are common > sense, don’t walk under a ladder, someone could fall on you, etc. > It is amazing all these things are going around.
I got the impression the original poster was actually asking about old traditions. I can’t think of any traditions that haven’t been mentioned, but I do remember these homilies from reading Laura Ingalls Wilder: Marry in black, wish yourself back Marry in haste, repent in leisure
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>writes: >> My mother always said that rain on a wedding day was bad luck. >I thought rain on your wedding day was suppose to be good luck. Really, >I think it was just made up so brides wouldn’t feel so bad that it >rained on THEIR DAY, but never the less, that is what I’ve heard. >Rain on your wedding day IS good luck, at least in terms of superstition. I >don’t care what that crackpot Alannis Morrisette sang!
Hey! Alannis never said it was bad luck, just that it was ironic (which 10 out of 10 english professors dispute). My mother always said it will rain on my wedding day, because it rained for my baptism and for my confirmation. It doesn’t bother me though, cause Jimmy Stewart, in It’s a Wonderful Life, said that the rain would wash away the old, and cleanse everything for out new lives together — Lisa C. ciferriATplatinumDOTcom May your e-mails never bounce, may your web connections be speedy, may no GPFs or core dumps come your way, may all your pointers be valid, your strings be null-terminated, your operating system stable, and may you project the illusion of being productive..
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Superstitions are just that, superstitions. We have been married 30+ yrs >and it >poured during the ceremony and the reception. Many of the ideas, black cats, >cracks in the sidewalk have power if YOU let them have power. Some are >common >sense, don’t walk under a ladder, someone could fall on you, etc. >It is amazing all these things are going around. >Carole Beth
<<snipped everything I wrote previously>> I didn’t mean to give the impression that I believe in superstitions. Quite the opposite! I showed my husband a picture of my dress, which is supposed to be a no-no. We had all our pictures made before the wedding, so he saw me before I walked down the aisle, another no-no. I can’t think of one superstition we clinged to at all. But if the original poster was simply looking for some of these old wedding wives’ tales and superstitions, here are two more. . . Throwing rice means fertility Tying cans to the car scares off evil spirits (of course they were origianlly tied to a buggy or whatever means the B&G used)
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> These are probably Southern things… > Lisa Mooty > marrying Bryan Johnson 9/20/98
Why are these necessarily Southern things? Eliza (& John 4/10/99) FROM GEORGIA
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>I am very interested in different superstitions regarding weddings. I have >done a search and I only found one site that had several superstitions. I >know the standard something old, something new, something borrowed, >something blue. But are there any others that anyone knows of?
The ones I can think of, besides the one you mentioned: For luck: Don’t let the husband to be see the bride in the dress before the wedding ceremony. Put a sixpence in the brides shoe. Get married while the minute hand of the clock is on the upswing (ei, and 4:35, not 4:00) Whoever catches the bridal bouquet will be the next to get married. I’m sure there are tons more. Anyone? Diane — May 9th, 1998 is approaching quickly…… Will you be ready?
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writes: > My mother always said that rain on a wedding day was bad luck. >I thought rain on your wedding day was suppose to be good luck. Really, >I think it was just made up so brides wouldn’t feel so bad that it >rained on THEIR DAY, but never the less, that is what I’ve heard.
Rain on your wedding day IS good luck, at least in terms of superstition. I don’t care what that crackpot Alannis Morrisette sang! Just a note here. . . we had tornado warnings–as in there were actual tornadoes in the area–just before and during our wedding. Cut the gues list from 125 to 85. I was frankly surprised so many did come. Everything went fine and there was no damage anywhere. I told everyone, "If rain is supposed to be good luck, we are in for something spectacular!" So far it’s true! koa Madison, AL
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Superstitions are just that, superstitions. We have been married 30+ yrs and it poured during the ceremony and the reception. Many of the ideas, black cats, cracks in the sidewalk have power if YOU let them have power. Some are common sense, don’t walk under a ladder, someone could fall on you, etc. It is amazing all these things are going around. Carole Beth – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > writes: >> My mother always said that rain on a wedding day was bad luck. >I thought rain on your wedding day was suppose to be good luck. Really, >I think it was just made up so brides wouldn’t feel so bad that it >rained on THEIR DAY, but never the less, that is what I’ve heard. > Rain on your wedding day IS good luck, at least in terms of superstition. I > don’t care what that crackpot Alannis Morrisette sang! > Just a note here. . . we had tornado warnings–as in there were actual > tornadoes in the area–just before and during our wedding. Cut the gues list > from 125 to 85. I was frankly surprised so many did come. Everything went > fine and there was no damage anywhere. I told everyone, "If rain is supposed > to be good luck, we are in for something spectacular!" So far it’s true! > koa > Madison, AL
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I am very interested in different superstitions regarding weddings. I have done a search and I only found one site that had several superstitions. I know the standard something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. But are there any others that anyone knows of? Thanks for any info, Anja
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I know you supposed to put a six pence in your shoe. You can find these at a craft store or bridal shop. In England you sew a tiny horseshoe in you dress or with a ribbon wrap it around you bouquet for good luck. Almonds at the recption for favors is for fertility. Thats all I can think of for now but if I find more I will write. By the way what was the name of that web site? Good Luck Kat
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>I am very interested in different superstitions regarding weddings. I have >done a search and I only found one site that had several superstitions. I >know the standard something old, something new, something borrowed, >something blue. But are there any others that anyone knows of?
My mother always said that rain on a wedding day was bad luck. When you go to a wedding, you should take a bit of the groom’s cake home with you and sleep with it under your pillow; you’ll dream about the man you’re going to marry. These are probably Southern things… Lisa Mooty marrying Bryan Johnson 9/20/98
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> My mother always said that rain on a wedding day was bad luck.
I thought rain on your wedding day was suppose to be good luck. Really, I think it was just made up so brides wouldn’t feel so bad that it rained on THEIR DAY, but never the less, that is what I’ve heard.
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My husband and I have both been ask to participate in a bridal party. Anyone know the superstition about us walking/not walking together in the church? This is especially important since the other two attendants are husband and wife as well. Any other superstitions which you know about might be interesting too. Awaiting replys, Ingrid
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And so I was wondering if maybe anyone who has favorite online wedding sites could share them…this would obviously benefit all of us. How about the name of the site, location, and brief description of what you like about it? Thanks! Michele (& Jonathan, 7/12/97)